Wow,
what a daunting question… “What makes a good Dominant?”
It’s like trying to describe DNA in great detail. Being Dominant
is complex, detailed, and no matter how complete the description, it
falls impossibly short of reality. Perhaps that is why so few
websites have detailed descriptions of what it means to be a Dominant.
While the descriptions, duties and needs of submissives are given
described in great attention, there is precious little space devoted to
Dominants.
But, for purpose of better understanding the lifestyle, and
the Dominant role within it, I shall endeavor to do My best. Here,
then, in no particular order, is My own impossibly incomplete
description of what it means to be a Dominant.
Mastery of One’s Self:
A
Dominant must always be in control of Him/Her Self. As a
Master/Mistress, the Dominant will take charge of a submissive. It
is impossible to take on the responsibility of Mastering another, if One
can not Master Themselves.
Personal Standards:
A
Dominant must set and maintain high personal standards for Themselves.
They must be an example to O/others, including Their submissive.
Self Respect:
If
not given to Themselves, it can not be shown to O/others.
Self Control:
Many things in life may challenge a Dominant. Control of One’s
Self is essential when those challenges present themselves.
Self Secure:
A
Dominant must know Themselves, and feel comfortable within Their
Own skin to project Themselves in a true fashion. They will be
challenged, and must be secure enough to tolerate differing opinions and
views without considering them as condemnation.
Compassionate & Understanding:
A
Dominant must be sensitive to the needs of O/others. As
Master/Mistress the Dominant will be responsible for the emotional
well-being of a submissive that requires an open and accessible
Dominant. They must be willing to share, and actively demonstrate
that sharing in return is both safe and healthy.
Communicative:
A
Dominant must be able to communicate effectively in any situation, under
any circumstances, in a variety of verbal and non-verbal ways.
Honesty:
This
is more than a concept, or a feeling. Honesty is expressed through
actions. And only in demonstrating honesty, will it be seen by
O/others.
Teacher/Guide:
Dominants
must meet the needs of a submissive for guidance. They are
responsible for the personal and lifestyle growth of Their one.
Their actions should be an example that teaches and guides E/everyone
They come in contact with.
Well Rounded:
W/we
often forget that D/s is a lifestyle, and a Dominant must be full and
complete. A Dominant must be romantic, happy, playful, have a
sense of humor, have interests and pleasures, and all the things that
make a complete human being.
Devoted:
A Dominant must
be Someone that can be counted on to be there, and to be available.
When there is a problem, or Their submissive needs assistance, the
Dominant must make every good faith effort to demonstrate that devotion.
